What's in a hero?

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.

James 4:10 esv

 

What’s in a hero?

As an author my mind is always running in the direction of my manuscripts, even when I’m not thinking about them. An artist can pick out scenes or interesting faces in a crowd with an eye toward the thought of drawing it later, taking in the details to sketch onto paper at the first opportunity. I know this because I have seen my sister and two of my children do it often. Without thought they absorb the details of what they are seeing and later transfer them to paper. That is a talent I do not have. Give me a ruler and a paper and I’ll draw you a slanted line.

But I can do with words what they can do with a pencil. That gift has opened my mind to seeing the world in a way I didn’t know. No matter where I am, who I’m talking to, or what I’m doing without thought my mind is tuned to the little details of life. What does this place and time feel like? How do I describe the smell of coffee? That statement would be great in my work in progress… Basically if I encounter it in life it’s fair game to show up in one of my manuscripts.

If you’ve been following my blog for any length of time you know my heroes are cowboys. If I handed you my computer and you could open up my saved manuscripts you would discover that all but about three of them feature cowboys.

Why?

Because cowboy’s are the epitome of the American West. Think of life in the 1800’s and most people tend to think cowboys. Men in dusters wearing Stetson’s carrying a gun and riding a horse. Or maybe it’s just the people I encounter that think that way. It seems that cowboys are the lingering breed of the men that settled our land, or so says a book I recently looked at in the bookstore.

Because of that they are seen as hero material by a good number of authors. Don’t believe me? Take a look at the shelf of your local bookstore. How many books feature cowboys? Westerns, romance, history… those are all genres that lean heavy on the cowboys. And you need look no further than the calendar section to find plenty of pictures to feed your mind.

I can blame my thoughts of cowboys being heroes on my grandpa. In some ways making my heroes be cowboys is a tribute to the man that I recently lost. I never saw him ride a horse but I never knew him to look like anything but a cowboy, complete with boots and hat.

I have heard others say bad things about him, know of things he did in his life that were anything but honorable, and yet, to me, my grandpa was a great man. His faults did not detract from what he was for me and to me.

What, you might ask, does that have to do with what is in a hero?

 Nothing.

And Everything.

This man that was the first cowboy that ever influenced my life was a cowboy in dress and to an extent in the way he saw life. As an author my characters come out of my imagination, out of the gift that the Lord has given me, but every so often they also come from real people.

I have recently been on the receiving end of some good natured ribbing about my cowboys. The person doing this is just teasing me and I know it but at the same time it has made me stop and look at my fictional heroes. Are they heroes because of the way they dress? Because they’re wearing guns and Stetsons? Or are they heroes because of who they are inside?

I have a manuscript that starts out: A man’s worth was measured by the size of his guns… That one line sets the entire scene. It and the couple of sentences after it place the hero in time and place, they clearly state the kind of man he is. He is a man, strong and willing to face the toughest situation. Because he is a hero and all heroes must live up to their reputation.

But the true worth of a man, the measure of whether or not he has what it takes to be a hero, lies not in the clothes he wears or the tools of his trade. They lie in his walk with the Lord. In his willingness to not only be a hero when needed but in his ability to be humble before God.

Can a man be a hero if he can’t lower himself before God in prayer? Can he be a hero if he doesn’t understand love? Can he be a hero if he lives his life according to his own ideas and not Scripture?

 

When conflict calls

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.

John 16:33

 

Do not be kind to your characters.

That is one of the ten commandments of writing. As an author the more…bad stuff I can throw at my characters the better the story. Are they in the mountains? Have one of them fall off a cliff. At the bank? Bring in the outlaws, complete with six shooters and intent on kidnapping the heroine. Oh the problems I can write into their lives with the click of a few keys. It’s the name of the game, the rule of writing.

Thankfully real life doesn’t work that way.

Or does it?

I’ve read many times that writers should never base a manuscript on their lives and they shouldn’t wish for a life like the heroines get. We don’t want the issues that the characters have to face. A nice steady normal is preferred. But when is normal ever really normal?

Today I got up with the intention of writing. My word count was my goal for the day. I was thinking only of how high I could make that number soar. And soar it did. In only a few hours I was pushing 5,000 words. My scene was flowing, my heroine was fuming and my hero was confused. Life was good in my alternate world.

Then reality intruded.

My phone rang.

It never occurred to me to ignore it. I just picked it up and answered my mind still on what was going on in my work in progress. Do not be kind to your characters left my writing world and became part of real life.

My mother had just received a call from my aunt. My grandmother is in the hospital facing major emergency surgery. In a panicked tone my sister informed us from the background that this surgery has a 20% survival rate, either that or the condition does. It was a bit hard to tell which was the most dangerous because my sister was muffled and my mother was talking over the top of her.

As the unofficial family medical research assistant I was told to gather information and call them back right away. I was unable to confirm the numbers but what I did find didn’t look promising. I set the computer aside and called my mother to inform her they’d be well served to make the two hour drive, only to be told they were about to leave.

I do not like being able to understand how my heroines feel when everything goes bad.

 

Mistakes

For we all stumble in many ways…

James 3:2

 

Rewriting. I’ve heard other authors say that word like it’s the most dreaded thing out there. I have yet to have to go through a rewriting the way published authors do but I have reworked a few scenes, and am now reworking a manuscript that is half complete because it’s been a while since I looked at it. And because I now know my character in a way I didn’t when I started writing this manuscript.

I’m discovering that rewriting is a world all its own. In one way I am enjoying it. In this rewriting I am getting the chance to read over my work, to catch things that I have forgotten. But it’s also slowing me down. I’m gaining very little word count as I work through this manuscript so that I will be reacquainted with it when I pick up where I left off.

But this rewriting hasn’t been all that difficult. The rewriting I made to a manuscript a couple of months ago, at the request of an agent, was. I had to make changes to a story I had fallen in love with while I wrote it. Some changes were easy and didn’t bother me, others I wanted to leave the way they were.

The hardest part of rewriting though came when I discovered that using the find and replace all options on my computer landed me in a whole heap of problems. It took my manuscript and made it so full of mistakes that it looked like the whole thing was underlined for misspelled words.

And I managed to miss that until long after I’d sent it in for review.

Thank you, God, for an understanding agent. When I figured out what had happened I sent in a fixed copy and an explanation very afraid she was going to tell me that my chance to have that manuscript looked at was over. I was very grateful when she understood.

Oh, the lessons I have learned on this journey of writing.

What has been the biggest mistake you’ve made as a writer or in your profession?

Love

And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.

Matthew 22: 37-39

 

In a recent post I wrote about the effects other people have on our lives. How they can change us, make us grow. I did not realize when I wrote that post that the Lord was using me in someone’s life even as I felt the effects of others in my own life.

There is a girl that passes through my life once a week. I hardly know her and rarely see her but the Lord puts us in the same place every week. A couple months ago I hugged this girl, or she hugged me. I don’t remember who instigated it but I did notice that when she hugged me she clung like she never intended to let go. After that day when I see her I try to make a point of hugging her.

Those hugs are special for me but they were but moments in my life. It was something I did because I felt like she might need it. She has managed to work her way into a spot in my heart but even at that I could not see what was happening during those brief, but clingy, encounters.

Yesterday, through my daughter, the Lord has shown me what it all meant. While I was nowhere around this girl told my daughter “no one hugs me like she does.” When I heard that, my heart became hers. This girl that could so easily have passed through my life without me paying her any attention has now become one of those moments that changed me, but more important I marvel that I may have become one of those encounters that will affect her for life.

Dear reader, Scripture commands us to love others as ourselves. This is often a hard task and is so easy to forget to do as we go about our daily lives. But we never know when the simple act of showing someone we care can mean all the difference to them. May we be the voice and the touch of Christ so that others might feel His love through us.

Understanding Characters

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

                                   Romans 5:3-5

 

Characters in books, like real life people, have personalities, interests, fears, hopes, dreams. They are complex and often do not reveal who they are until far into the book. As a writer that does not plan out my stories it takes me many pages to truly get to know my characters. They whisper who they are, little by little, scene by scene, until I know them as well as I know myself.

But sometimes there comes along a character that truly stumps me. Generally speaking my female characters are tough. They’re a bit mouthy, sometimes sassy. They’re capable and face life as it comes, handling problems when others might back away from them. These heroines are all different but most have had an inner strength that comes through when needed.

Because I do not plan my manuscripts before I write them, the story is as much of a surprise to me as it will be to everyone that ever reads it. Most times my manuscripts reach 75,000-100,000 words and I put very little thought into what they are going to be about. I do, however, often pray over the words I am writing.

The way I write is a gift the Lord has given me. I did not go looking for this ability, did not have any real desire to be a writer. But the Lord had other plans for me and He used my daughter to nudge- okay, push- me into something I never dreamed I could do.

It has become something I truly enjoy and spend hours at. But even still, when that character I can’t get a handle on pops up…it stumps me. This is what one of my most recent heroines has done to me. Her name is Kayden. She is a mix of different things that at first sight don’t seem to add up. At 26 she is still facing life with a scar left from a tragedy that happened when she was 16.  That scar is affecting her life in ways even she can’t see. She is living on the fringes of the kind of life she loves but not fully engaging.

At the same time she has a very deep faith in God and faces life and that faith with a childlike acceptance that few can understand. She is, quite simply, an anomaly. And she stumped me. 40,000+ words into the manuscript I stumbled. I did not know where to take her, what to do with her. The words although still flowing and fitting with the story weren’t working for me. My scenes are good, the story is good but there was something I couldn’t quite grasp.

So…I did what I do not like to do. I set that story aside, quit working on it because I couldn’t figure out what was happening and started another one. In one way I knew I was having a hard time connecting with the story, but in another I couldn’t figure out why that was. I could have pushed through, continued until I completed the story and chalked it up to being one of those that I just didn’t connect with- I have done that before. But I did not want to do that with this one.

Now I understand. Kayden was the problem. She was a person I could not figure out. She was acting one way, thinking another. Running hot and cold at the same time. As the writer I could go back and change her personality, make her into what I want her to be, but I won’t. This is where the gift comes in. I write what the Lord gives me, and he gave me Kayden. She is an intricate person that acts in a way that lets the world see only a small part of who she is. The woman inside is someone only a handful of people ever get to see. Even those closest to her never see that side of her. The more her inner character came out, the more I struggled with her story.

Until now.

 Because now I understand who she is.

Dear readers, I am sure that some of you can identify with Kayden’s personality. Are there things that you keep close to your heart? Things that you can’t or won’t share with others? What does it take to get a person like Kayden to open up, fully, to another person? And what kind of person would they have to be to accomplish that task?

Miracles

While God also bore witness by signs and wonders and various miracles and by gifts of the Holy Spirit distributed according to his will.

Hebrews 2:4

 

There are moments in our lives when we are changed. Instantly. The birth of a first child, a life threatening encounter, a near death experience…these are all things that have that kind of power. They take what we were and turn us into so much more. There are other times when we are changed slowly, over time, in a way we cannot see or feel.

People, places, events, these all have the power to change us. We have all been changed, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse, but changed just the same. Life is a series of changes from before we are born until we no longer live on this earth.

Just this last week I have been changed. I was looking at what, to me, is a miracle. Sunbeams shining through the clouds. Standing there in the midst of others, I was lost to what was going on around me. There was nothing but that moment, those beautiful rays, me, and God. In that moment I was alone with my Lord and I needed nothing else. But then someone touched me, not the light touch of a passerby, or the tap of someone trying to get my attention, but the close touch of someone coming as close as they could get, leaning against me.

This person, standing so close, shared that space and time with me and God, then she shared a miracle of her own with me. I did not know why I liked this person so much, until that moment, although it took me until the next day to fully grasp it all. She was one of those moments when I was changed instantly.

Matthew 22:39 says we are to love our neighbor as ourselves, it is the second greatest commandment. There are many other verses that talk of love, even command us to love. This woman, that was one of those life changing moments for me, is a wonderful example of that love. She simply loves everyone she encounters. No one walks away without a hug and being told I love you. You cannot help but feel loved in her presence.

She is an inspiration to me. When I asked if she was always that way, she said no. Before her own life changing moment she was not this way. God worked a miracle in her life, and she is a miracle in mine.

There have been many life changing moments in my life. Looking back on them I can see God’s hand on me in each one.

My dear reader, moments will come your way when you see that change. There will be others when it can’t be seen. God is working on and through you even if you don’t see or understand it. Let him show you the miracles He has in place for you.

What miracles have you already seen? Will you share them with us?

 

 

Entertaining Angels

Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.

                                    Hebrews 13:2

 

Every single day of our lives the Lord is working. He works on us, through us, in us, and around us. He fits us into His plans, molding us as He sees fit to get us where He wants us to be. He takes a little from our lives here, adds a little there. Like a potter molding clay He smooth's out wrinkles on this side and creates something beautiful on that side.

If we climb out of bed in the morning there is a good chance that He will use us in someone’s life and may, quite possibly, use someone else in ours. Sometimes we never know the impact we have on another. The simple act of smiling at someone could change their lives.

But then there are the times when someone comes into our lives and we see the impact. Have you ever stopped to think about the sheer odds of what it takes for you to meet someone new? No matter who they are or what role they play in your life. You had to be there, in that spot, at that moment to meet them. And so did they. In our usually busy lives what does it take for two complete strangers to wind up in the right place at the same moment so that they can touch each other’s lives?

I’ve seen this happen in my writing, among the new friends I have made in the writing world. There is an author that worked closely with me this past winter. We stumbled on each other because I asked the right question, in the right place, at the right time. Through her guidance I learned a lot about what it takes to take my story and make it fit the guidelines set in place by agents and publishers.

Another author showed up in my life because I won several contests where her books were the prize. We exchanged several emails and through her I was encouraged. Later, the same woman judged a contest I entered. Her kind words of praise for my entry lifted my spirits and encouraged me in my writing in a way no one else has.

I’ve seen this same miracle happen in life, many times, but some of those chance encounters have meant so much more than others. The Lord has recently brought one of the most amazing women I’ve ever met into my life. I was drawn to her from the first moment we met. In only a few short months she has captured my heart. We are born into our families, blessed by the people the Lord has chosen to make a part of our lives through family ties, and then there are the ones that are family of the heart. This woman is that for me.

There are more of these people that have worked their way into my life in ways that should have been impossible. A close friend that became that simply because we were drawn to each other online, through conversations that held nothing of a personal nature until we are now more like sisters than friends.

Another friend I met when I was somewhere I did not plan to be, at a time I had no intention of being there, at a time that this friend did not want to be there either. And yet we were. Through a few short words, and a smile, we have become friends in a way that has touched me deeply and changed my life.

Dear reader, I am sure that there are people like these in your life. Friends you didn’t expect, strangers that may have only passed through your day but changed your life. Who are they? How did you meet them? Will you share some of these miracle friendships with us?

Trust In The Lord

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,

and do not lean on your own understanding.

Proverbs 3:5

 

It’s been a little over a year since I, rather reluctantly, sat down at my computer to try my hand at writing that first manuscript. During that time my writing has taken a turn I never could have imagined. On that first day I wrote simply to please my daughter, now I write because I can’t not write. I have discovered that the Lord has given me a gift and it has become a large part of me. During this time I have found very few things interfere with my ability to write, there are many things that keep me too busy to write, but very few make it where I can’t write. About six weeks ago I completed a move to a new house that I didn’t want to make. Moving was something that interfered with my writing, both in time and ability.

It took time to get moved, time to settle in but I also discovered that living in this new house that didn’t feel like home interfered also. It affected the gift that the Lord gave me, kept the words from flowing the way they usually do. But as in all things God worked this out for good (Romans 8:28) and He showed me things that I didn’t know.

I long ago placed my life in the Lord’s hands, giving Him full control of my life, but when it came time to have to make this move…I didn’t want to do it. I struggled through the thought of moving, struggled with having to move. There were times I wanted to question the Lord on what He was doing to me, ask Him why I needed to go through this trial, in a year that had already been filled with them, but in the end I didn’t ask, I just submitted.

When I couldn’t find a house that met our needs I prayed and gave it to the Lord. I told Him that I was placing it all in His hands because I’d exhausted my resources. There was nothing left that I could do. Only a few hours after that I got a call from a man that had a house and he was willing to pull it off the market and hold it for me if I wanted it.

I took that as an answer to prayer and accepted. Over the next couple of weeks he worked with me in ways I could never have dreamed to get us into this house. So, dear reader, if you’re wondering if God answers prayer, I can tell you, without doubt, that He does.

Now, after over a month in this new house, I can see what I couldn’t when I was fighting the need to move. God has moved me to a better place. And now that it is feeling like home, my writing is back and except for those days when life interferes, my word count is back where it was before. In this house I have even managed an all-time high of 15,000 words in a single day.

And I am thanking the Lord for the blessings He sends my way, even when I struggle with the plans He has set in motion.